Syria and Assad

 

My dad once told me a joke about Assad, though I’ll clarify the Assad he was referencing was not the current Assad but the old Assad, Assad’s dad. Apparently this joke is well known throughout the Middle East, thought maybe it’s only popular amongst displaced Palestinians growing up in Lebanon. Who knows. After watching the way the current, ahem, democratically elected Syrian president has dealt with their internal civil uprising, and taking into consideration our own, ahem, democratic elections, I figure it’s okay to share this joke. Consider it social activism. So here we go…………………….

A guy went into a voting center to cast his vote for president, and being a man of consciousness, he voted for the candidate that best represented his own views.

On his way home, he suddenly realized that he’d made an awful mistake. He’d gone in and voted for a candidate that was not Assad, and they had ways to know that he did so. Certain regimes don’t take kindly to that, and by doing something as simple as casting an honest vote he had jeopardized the lives of him and his family. He knew that there was a reason Assad had a 99% approval rating. Chills ran down his spine.

He ran back to the voting booth and pleaded with the polling agent.

“Please, I’ve made a mistake!” said the man. “I meant to vote for Assad but I accidentally voted for his opponent. I came back to correct my mistake, and please, I beg of you, let me make sure my vote is casted as intended!”

The pollster laughed.

“Don’t worry,” he said, “we found your mistake and have already fixed it.”

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